still feeling like it has to end sometime...
I just don't know how to get out of this funk. I keep telling myself that your day is what you make it, but it seems like bad things happen and it makes me angry/sad/etc. these past few days. Maybe it's just that I'm more tuned in to the bad things. I don't want myself to start sliding backwards now. I don't. I've been there and I don't ever want to go there again.
Yesterday I felt just sad all day at work. It was the longest day of my life. I got pissed off, pissed someone else off over the phone, and got screamed at by that person. I felt I deserved it so I just let them scream at me. I doubt myself all the time. Even when I say I'm right, in the back of my head, I think that maybe I'm not.
I apologize for those reading this. It makes me feel better writing it down, however. Perhaps I should write it somewhere else, but then again, this is MY diary, so...oh, shit, who cares?
My parents are coming over tonight and mom wants to go shopping. Yeah, that'll make me feel better- hearing you talk about how this and that won't fit you because you're a size 8 or whatever. I told her yesterday I didn't think I wanted to go. I think I would rather come home from work and work on straightening up the house for hubby's parents that will be here on Tuesday.
I bought some pansies and some other flowers yesterday, and I plan on planting them outside this weekend. That will make me feel better for sure.