ron J
Well, Goddamn! In our little podunk town, the great Ron Jeremy is coming to the grand opening of a new porno (I mean, ADULT) store that just opened.
No, I haven't checked out the store yet, but I've heard it's very light inside and quite like an adult Wal-Mart of exciting adventurous products.
I WANT TO MEET RON JEREMY! I watched him in VH one's Surre@l Life show, and watched the documentary on him. I've never even seen one of his porno films. It's amazing how a sweaty, hairy dude got famous in the adult industry simply because of the size of his unit.
So, I wanna go meet Ron Jeremy, but I won't be able to. No one will go with me, and to be honest, I wouldn't want to go without an army of bodyguards. Usually, I'm one of those "touch me and die" bitches, but being visibly pregnant has made me feel vulnerable. I'm afraid of the weirdos staring and ew, thinking perverted thoughts.
Like I said, normally it wouldn't bug me but for some reason it does now. I'm afraid to go without people to protect me, so I guess I'm not going. Hubby is not interested. I even tried to entice him, reminding him that there's some porn wench that's gonna be there with Ron, but he wasn't interested. So, I'll have to go without any autographed boobs- and dammit, they look halfway decent now!
Yesterday I almost didn't make it to work. There was a moose in our yard. I watched it walk up the driveway and walk right up to the front door. I mean, it was rubbing it's head on the door. It was a small bull, with antlers just starting. I had to leave for work, so I just slipped out the side door and backed VERY SLOWLY out of the driveway. The moose just stared, but I could tell he was nervous.